Today marks exactly two-and-a-half years since we first laid eyes on the sweetest little boy that we've ever been privileged to know.
I wish I could say that things are getting easier, but I'd be lying. It's often more difficult to know that we haven't been able to hold Jacob that much longer...to know that the last time I saw Jakey was so many days more than I could ever have imagined being without him. Every mark on the calendar reminds us of how much we miss Jake -- each day that passes, each monthly mark on the 15th, and especially every holiday.
Another "marker" that I have waited to share is Jake's headstone, which was placed at the beginning of February. I've waited to share pictures, so that others would have an opportunity to visit and see it in person, as it was incredibly difficult for Josh and I to first see it...most days, it still is. Perhaps I wasn't emotionally ready to share it because it made things that much more real. This marker is one that no parent should ever have to see, but it offers us a way that we can still see Jakey's handsome little face when we visit.
In retrospect, a headstone just doesn't capture the extraordinary life that Jacob had, nor can it express the immense amount of love that was felt for our sweet boy -- it's just a harsh visual reminder of what we've lost.
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| The wording at the bottom says: You brought joy and love into the hearts of many. Love you forever. "Love you forever" comes from an excerpt of one of our favorite books that we used to read together. |
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| A close up of his picture, which was one of our favorites taken on his 1st birthday. |
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| I love this quote and it's one that we included on the program given out at Jacob's Celebration of Life. |
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ReplyDeleteI am so sorry Sarah ... I wish I could put little jake right back in your arms, just where he belongs. He touched the lives of so many and is such a special little guy that is so loved. His headstone is a beautiful tribute to a most beautiful boy. Sending love always. Xoxo
ReplyDeleteGrammie Loves You, Jakey ~ I miss you, Each & Every Day ~ All my Love, Grammie Kathy
ReplyDeleteI WISH I COULD REACH UP TO HEAVEN AND BRING HIM BACK TO MY GRANDCHILDREN JOSH AND SARAH. PLEASE NEVER FORGET WHAT WONDERFUL PARENTS YOU WERE TO JACOB, IN ALL MY YEARS I HAVE NEVER SEEN SUCH TWO DEVOTED PARENTS LIKE YOU TWO!! THE PRIDE I FELT IN WATCHING YOU BOTH CARE FOR JACOB I WILL NEVER FORGET. YOU TWO ARE VERY SPECIAL AND JACOB IS WATCHING AND HE KNEW HOW MUCH YOU LOVED HIM AND HOW GREAT YOU TOOK CARE OF HIM. I WILL NEVER FORGET WHAT KIND AND GENTLE PARENTS YOU ARE. I LOVE YOU BOTH VERY MUCH! LOVE, GRAMMA GRACE
ReplyDeleteOh Sarah, I'm wrapping my arms around you and giving you a huge hug.
ReplyDeleteSarah, I am sending you much love and many hugs your way! Jakey knew how much you and Josh loved and still love him everyday! Forever in your hearts he will stay! All my love! XO
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry Sarah, there will never be words to fix it and I hate that. I love his headstone, it is beautiful. I cannot believe how much Kelly looks like Jacob! she is so perfect. sending you so much love ,Chelsea
ReplyDeletePerfectly said, Chelsea. We all hate it. Sadly, I told Chelsea the other day, Sarah, that all of these "un-anniversaries" are so embedded in me that I don't need a calendar to remember them. I hate the sadness of these marks on your hearts and wish with all of mine that they were marks of happiness instead. Because of your generous sharing, your Jakey became our Jakey and for that I and so many others will always be grateful. Sending you a world of love and hugs. xoxo
ReplyDeleteThere are no words to take the pain away, just love from others to hold you up.
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